Looking at starting the New Year, we have to set the tone. Usually, there is the “new year, new me”, or the new year resolutions. In the beginning we have all these goals that seems to dwindle back into our old ways as time goes on. Why is that though? Why do we have all this confidence in the New Year but then become so defeated? What can we do to make sure we don’t revert back? What can we do to prevent bringing baggage from the previous year into the next; let alone bringing baggage into the next week of our lives? Where can we get the confidence and self-discipline to stop an ugly cycle of bad habits?

There was a bunch of self-reflection questions, don’t let them overwhelm you. We will work through them together. So speaking of Confidence, we have all heard the sayings “Confidence is Key” and “Fake it until you make it”. Let’s not forget the million self-care tutorials streaming across many platforms of the internet. Trust me, I have spent countless hours watching/reading them too. This won’t be your average make sure you moisturize self-care blog.

Instead, let’s talk about Soul-Care. Seriously though, don’t forget to moisturize. It’s no doubt important too! Those two sayings that we’ve all have heard a million times to get us through some things in our lives may seem like complete opposites. In some scenarios they are, but you can’t actually be confident if you’re faking it, right?

At face surface, Absolutely. Until that one more thing (usually minor) happens and becomes the straw that breaks the camels’ back. It seems last year; especially in December the camel (me) has been covered in the haystack instead!

Faking it until I make it was 2021’s motto. And I barely made it through the year.

I refused to bring any of the baggage along with me into this year. But that got me to thinking… Why did I insist on dragging it with me week to week this past year? Besides getting married, 2021 was not kind to me. The main goal for 2022 is to get off the hamster wheel of insanity.


Let’s look at what exactly being on that hamster wheel means… The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

God has a interesting way of getting his point across sometimes. As I have been writing this blog post on and off for the last week on Soul-Care, I believe God knew a part of me had no idea where this was going. I had no clue how to conclude this; causing writers block putting me past my deadline of a promised dropped blog post.

This certainly put me back on the hamster wheel. Extremely stressed out and a two year old tantrum only seemed to make the wheel go faster. I snapped at my children and husband; cocooning myself to the bedroom crying through the guilt and frustration I was feeling. I was bringing my baggage and same bad habits of 2021 into the evening; but why?

I’m not quite sure how long I laid there spinning through all my emotions and praying through the distress; but I do know I am exceptionally grateful for the grace my husband gave me through the insanity. God used that to set off a light build along with a reset for some much needed self-care.

Between the hot shower and alone time, God spoke to me giving me emphasis for the understanding even for myself of what Soul-Care meant. Self-Care definitely helps but as I prayed asking God what Soul-Care was suppose to be about – “This, This is what you’re suppose to write about” repeatedly came up in my spirit.

Playing tug of war in my spirit, trying to fathom the idea of writing about feeling like I was losing control. Trying to understand how that had anything to do with Soul-Care. But that had everything to do with it.

Throughout my childhood and especially in my adult years; I have learned that I had control issues. I’m not proud of them but in my mind if I could control what was going on around me then I couldn’t get hurt or blind sighted. Boy, has that been a lesson learned the hard way. It dawned on me that most of my baggage was a result of control.

When I feel as if I am losing control or situation close to me is being threatened; becoming so overwhelmed self-control is then out of the equation of things. Now, how does any of this have anything to do with the Soul?

Time to Care for the Soul

This starts with self-awareness. I bet you thought I was about to suggest lathering yourself with Holy Water. It doesn’t quite work that way. I will say; it will help cleanse the soul though. You have to be aware of what is going on in your soul; at the core to be able to more forward.

For example: Anger is usually a secondary emotion. It stems from originally feeling some kind of disappointment, frustration, discouragement etc. Becoming self aware means you learn to control your own emotions versus trying to control everything around you from triggering your emotions.

Dread, Bitterness, Laziness, People Pleasing, Anxiety, Depression, Procrastination etc. It’s time to release them. In the beginning we asked the question why is that we ended dwindling back into our old ways? Here’s a good way to answer that. We don’t do a proper self- aware soul cleaning. We bag all the issues we have and try to resolve them all at the same time. Instead, we have to make a conscious decision of focusing on one thing at a time and remember to give it God along the way.

As of today, my sister decided to do a little soul- cleaning herself. She is very young and within the last couple of years drifted from the Lord. Everyone does. I have more times then I can count. When we were children, she had such this passion and blessing over her anyone could see. Over at least the last year, I have prayed and prayed for my sister to desire the on-fire relationship she once shared with God that was more beautiful then words could describe. Today we reached the tip of that prayer being answered.

This past year I have carried so much hope for this very moment today. Along with and especially working through so many of my own flaws. Trusting God. That’s the biggest part of this Soul-Care no matter where you are in life. Take baby steps to open those lines of communication between you and God, having confidence in him to be able to cleanse yourself from some of the insanity keeping you from your restoration. This way we can get off the hamster wheel of self-destruction over and over again expecting different results.

But we are not of those who shrink back to destruction, but of those who have faith to the preserving of the soul – Hebrews 10:39

You cant always get a new start to your story, but you can write a new ending – Philippians 3:13-14 (Interpreted by Popular Pastor Steven Furtick )

#Blog #MentalHealth #Momlife #SelfCare

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